Living with borderline personality disorder: Megan's story

Borderline personality disorder (BPD), sometimes also known as emotional regulation disorder, is a complex condition that impacts a person’s ability to manage moods and express emotions.

Symptoms can include avoiding abandonment at all costs, unstable relationships, suicidal ideation, periods of emotional intensity, chronic emptiness, paranoia and dissociation.

selectability consumer Meagan who lives with BPD – shares her story in hopes of encouraging others to seek help.

This is her story…

For 23 year-old Meagan a diagnosis of borderline personality disorder (BPD) while nearing the end of high school provided some answers and direction in her recovery journey.

As Meagan explains she felt that for her the diagnosis “made a lot of sense”.

“It was definitely a tough time for me, I was finishing high school and had just moved back to Townsville with my family," said Megan.

“When I was diagnosed with BPD – while also having symptoms of anxiety and depression – it made sense. Not just in terms of relationships with family and friends but it also made some events in my life a lot clearer."

BPD can present itself with a vast array of symptoms, which can often cause confusion and misunderstanding.

For Meagan BPD presents itself as an intense fear of abandonment or instability and often she has difficulty being alone.

“I find I am always second guessing myself and doubting myself. I also find it difficult to regulate emotions. It’s been very hard to get past but I’m working on all that now.”

Since her diagnosis Meagan has spent time in both the Townsville Private Clinic and Townsville Hospital and Health Service acute ward. It was during her stay in acute that Meagan was first connected with selectability.

“While I was in hospital the acute team helped me organise support shifts with selectability.”

As Meagan explains the supports she has since been receiving “have been amazing”.

“I went from two support shifts and then without me having to ask the selectwellbeing coordinator gave me an extra shift because they could see I needed it.

“Now I have three, two-hour support shifts a week. Sometimes we just sit and talk about anything – from mental health to what I’ve been doing – and it’s just what I need. Other times we have gone and done particular things like go to the chemist or to appointments.

Meagan also attends group programs at our new Mental Health Hub based out of selectability Corner, 134 Denham St in the City.

 “When I first started I couldn’t enter a room to do a group program, but now I’ve been able to come to groups and to the Hub and it has helped me make those social connections and talk to people.

“In a way I’ve come a fair way since being able to link up with selectability.”